Teide Challenge: Dean Puts Foot Down, Stan Finds the Hills

Dean’s Data Blitz

Ey up! Last week, I set t’BikeErg on fire—287km with all the subtlety of a brass band on Blackpool front. That’s nearly double me usual mileage, and a proper jump on my 4-week average (149km). 10 and a half hours, too. A man’s got to earn his cuppas. Only detour? One real ride outdoors. Otherwise, t’garage has never seen so much sweat.

Stan’s Out and Up

Uncle Stan—Yorkshire’s own sleeveless wonder—clocked 192km. Five and a half hours, mostly on spin bikes and t’Keiser M3. But hold on: Stan’s got his outdoor legs on, with a gorgeous 573 metres up hill on a single ride. Stone me. His 4-week average is higher for climbing (1214m), so he’s no stranger to a slope.

Form Book

Hours? Dean edges it. Kilometres? Dean again. Elevation? Stan grabs that one with a testy Yorkshire hand. He’s supposedly working on his ‘bikini figure’ (see you on Playa de las Américas, Stan), but really, he’s out there plotting climbs that’d make a sheep dizzy.

The Score

One’s clocking miles, t’other’s chasing every hill on t’maps. Only fair: I handle the stats, Stan handles the string vest. If Teide throws up gradients and fake tan, we’re both ready—sort of. Watch this space, next week’s numbers won’t flatter a man who skips his rides!